There are many unrealistic expectations that one can have from their partner. We will be discussing the top 11 from that list of Unrealistic (or Unhealthy) expectations in a relationship.
1. Your partner should always agree with everything you say
What is ‘Unrealistic’
It feels good when someone accepts your thoughts and decisions. And if that “someone” is your partner, the feeling is still better. But just think about it. Do you think you can never be wrong? You know that anyone, including you, can be wrong at times. In such a case your partner has to disagree with you and suggest what you should do instead. If you expect your partner to agree to everything you say and never argue or altercate, then it’s not a realistic expectation for sure.
What it doesn't mean
It doesn’t mean that you fear that your partner will always disagree with you. If there are conflicts between you, you both can discuss the points of disagreement and try to figure out a logical way of solving problems instead of agreeing or disagreeing with each other every time.
2. Your partner should spend all their free time Only with You
What is ‘Unrealistic’
Just as you have your friends, family, and loved ones, your partner too has his/her loved ones. They might also need some time to spend with them or sometimes they just need their own ‘ME’ time to get refreshed by doing anything they want to do alone. Not giving them their own time occasionally and expecting them to spend all their free time only with you is not a healthy expectation.
What it doesn't mean
Of course, being partners, you both should spend time together. No one can stop you from hanging out, going out for a movie or dinner. But, giving and taking ‘some’ free time from each other and spending quality time together would be helpful for your relationship.
3. Your partner should always look like a model
What is ‘Unrealistic’
If you are in a relationship with someone only because the person has an amazing physical appearance, sooner or later you will get disappointed, because unfortunately, looks get fade.
Your partner may be tired or sick or might not be feeling well on some day and may not look physically good. Anyone cannot look like an actor or an actress all the time. If you want your partner to be physically “Presentable” in front of others always, it is not a realistic expectation.
What it doesn't mean
You are not unrealistic if you want a beautiful, smart, handsome, good-looking partner. Everyone has some thoughts on how their partner should look like. So, it doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t think to have a beautiful or handsome partner for yourself. It’s just that instead of thinking to “Present” your partner in front of someone else so that others can say “Wow You have a Hot and Sexy partner”, try to like and accept them how they look.
4. Your partner should have no friends of the opposite sex (or whatever sex they're attracted to)
What is ‘Unrealistic’
Do you become jealous if your partner talks to someone? Do you stop him/her when he/she meets his/her friends of the opposite sex (or whatever sex they’re attracted to)? Expecting your partner not to have a friendship with the opposite sex people (or whatever sex they’re attracted to) can hamper their social relationship that will ultimately hamper your relationship.
What it doesn't mean
Anyone can have friends of any gender, age group or society. If you doubt that your partner is ‘More than Just a Friend’ with someone, you can discuss about that specific instance, but doubting everyone with whom your partner talks and getting jealous is not good for your relationship.
5. Your partner should be aware of all your feelings and moods (even if you don’t tell them)
What is ‘Unrealistic’
It can never be better if your partner understands what you are thinking and how you are feeling. But I believe your partner is not a mind-reading machine. It’s not possible every time for them to proactively know if you are feeling good or bad. So, instead of expecting it every time, you can simply show some signs or directly tell them that you are not feeling good.
What it doesn't mean
We all need our partners to understand our feelings and give their helping hands and shoulders to cry whenever we need. So, expecting your partner to do so itself is not a wrong expectation, but you should understand that they also have their own limits and may not be able to know your feelings unless you tell them.
There are many more unrealistic expectations that anyone can have from their partner. We have discussed 5 from the list of 11 commons in this blog. To read the next (second) part of this blog, click here: 11 Unrealistic (or Unhealthy) expectations in a relationship – Part 2
Think about the following questions:
1. What other Unrealistic Expectations have you or your partner had in past?2. Do you or your partner still have any Unrealistic Expectations that are hampering your relationship?3. What are you doing to get rid of such unrealistic (or unhealthy) expectations?
Please mention in the comments below.
इस ब्लॉग को हिंदी में पढ़ने के लिए इस लिंक पर क्लिक करें: संबंधों में 11 अवास्तविक (या अस्वस्थ) अपेक्षाएँ (भाग-1)
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